Shit, Shite, Shat, and Shlemeel

Tired at midnite. Shit. Opened up a game of Solitaire and then said, “No, dammit! I’m tired, and I should just go to bed!!” Shite. Well, two and a half hours later, I was still frakking tired, but the old mind was up to its old tricks. Shat. And I am seriously thinking I need sleep meds. Shlemeel.

Damned thing about sleep drugs is the fact that I ain’t met a ‘script that doesn’t make my brain feel like it was made outa cotton candy in the morning. Hard to walk, hard to even think. Just a complete fuzz-brain (like I ain’t one already!!). Now, I s’pose that I could go the route of dimenhydrinate (Gravol, to you name brand users). 2 of those at 2100, into bed and lites out at 2200, and blink! gone ’til morning. No hangover, no fuzziness.

Bitch of that is that it won’t be prescribed and I let myself be talked into a relapse back in ’88. I took generic Gravol two nites in a row way back then and my first wife talked to someone in program who said I relapsed. So, I gave up my June 6 clean date and subbed it to September 12. Never took the fuckers ever since.

Hey, being the addict that I am, I know what those puppies can do to you if you pop a whole whack of ‘em. I’m talking multiples of ten, as in 40, 50, and more. That is one mean fucking high. I did it twice in my career and swore off that kinda buzz forever. — right right, I know, there ain’t no such thing as forever to an addict. My next drug is just around the corner… — I mean, fuck-dee-diddly-doo!! I just wanna get into some good sleep for the night and not do this gawdfersaken up all nite, up all day, crash at 2100, sleep ’til 1500 the next day, and then be screwed regarding any normal type of sleeping pattern. Which is my current sitch right now.

Ah, but what the hey, eh. I couldn’t afford even the generic shit whilst on welfare. And it’s an OTC drug, thus I couldn’t get a script for it if I tried. Kinda like the 81mg ASA I take daily right now. That comes outa my pocket, even tho’ I really don’t gots me no idea why I take the shit. Sure don’t help me none no how with my vocabulary and spelling gifts, now dun it? ah-yup, fer sher, aye??

I guess that is why I have this blog to mess around with. It sure as shootin’ doesn’t wipe out the multitudinous complexity of thoughts that go ripping pell mell thru my already over-taxed brain. I mean, shit, can you imagine how hard it was to write that previous sentence??? shoot… shlemeel…

Well, I gotta split now. My anti-virus scanner just kicked in and that has a tendency to mess up Bloogle and my connection therewith. Ta-ta, good people. May as well just turn off the lites and see if’n the ol’ grey matter is still raring to take me on a joyride from heck. If not, then I’ll sleep until suppertime and then get my sorry ass off to a meeting, one that I know will be open and welcoming to this here still suffering addict. !!!! woot !!!!

Keep The Faith*